Mothers Day 2012

Mother of 4!  I can sometime hardly believe it.  If I weren't actually living it, I would find it utterly hard to believe.  I can honestly say that I have chosen the best career in the entire universe.  The pay is amazing.  I may sometimes be exhausted, worn out, and feel completely under appreciated, but the dividends are so rewarding and the love I receive in return is absolutely priceless.  I received waffles, strawberries and whip cream in bed this morning. Then my kids and hubby made a delicious dinner for me, while babes and I took a long nap in my bed.  It was sheer heaven. I didn't cook a thing today, didn't clean a dish.  Gloria and Hallelujah!!  I feel enraptured and blissful.  Is my life perfect? Nope.  Do I still have my struggles?  You bet!  But each day I have to stop and count my blessings, sometime even listing them off one by one in prayer, and I am overwhelmed by the love that my Father in Heaven has for me.  His goodness and mercy are incalculable and I wonder what in this life I have done to deserve His richest blessings.  But I will cease trying to figure that out, and just serve these 4 little people to the best of my ability.  Happy Mothers Day!!

December 22, 2011

Three weeks ago today, my life changed forever.  The little spirit I’d been praying about for several years finally came to our family.  What a spiritual event that day was. Here are the events leading up to, and the actual events of that day.

As November came to an end, I grew increasingly more and more uncomfortable and I knew that the looming due date of December 12^th was not to be.  My Christmas shopping had been finished since October 22^nd, and even the wrapping had been finished.  I ran a few errands on the 30th of November, and knew by the way I was feeling that it was a matter of days before delivery.  A woman really knows her body.  I had my cleaning lady Carmen come to the house the morning of the 30^th, and 2 hours into her cleaning, I went for an hour long walk to get the baby to drop.  I called Angelique and we talked for the entire hour.  It was great therapy to get my mind off my discomfort.  Later that day, after I admired my beautifully cleaned house, I headed to the school to pick up the kids.  It was difficult to lower myself into the car because I could feel her little head protruding and each movement was difficult.  I drove to the school and every 10 minutes or so, I would have a pretty hard contraction.  Nothing that took my breath away, but they were pretty good contractions.  When I pulled up to the school, I could tell by the look on the kids faces that they were surprised it was me picking them up.  One of their teachers even leaned her head into the car and said, “I’m surprised to see you here.”

As we were driving home from school, all I could think about was getting to the couch and putting my feet up.  I remembered however, that we didn’t have much produce in the house and I decided to make a stop at Sprouts grocery to pick up some fruit and vegetables so our house would have some fresh stuff to eat.  We pulled up to the grocery store and Makenna and Emery opted to stay in the car and work on homework.  Tal wanted to go in with me.  He took my hand in the parking lot and we began walking into the store. We were still 20 feet from the entrance when I felt a small trickle of water in my pants.  My water had never broken before so I dismissed it as nothing and continued into the store.  Tal and I made it to the produce section and began bagging some tomatoes, and then cucumbers, when I felt a slightly larger trickly of water in my pants.  At this, I knew that it had to be my bag of water breaking.  We hurriedly grabbed some bananas, lettuce and apples and we rushed to the front of the store.  I kept telling Talmage, “come on buddy, we gotta hurry!”  He kept asking what our hurry was but I didn’t want to alarm him, so I just told him we needed to get going.  We headed to the shortest checkout line, which ended up being the longest checkout line due to some couponing complications.  I regret now that I didn’t speak up and say, “Excuse me but my water just broke!”  When do you ever get to say that?  When we got back into the car, Makenna could read the distress on my face and asked what was wrong.  I told her that I believed that my water just broke.  She excitedly said, “Yes!”

When we got home, I told Brandon what had happened, but since I wasn’t having any really hard contractions, I didn’t feel panicked or hurried.  In fact Brandon was still planning on attending his Young Men Stake Dodgeball tournament that same evening.  Knowing that he was leaving early, and that it was already 4:15, I began cooking some hamburger for tacos.  By 4:45 dinner was done and I was serving tacos for the family.  Brandon wanted to be heading for the tournament around 5:00.  Just then, Molly called and asked me how I was feeling.  She was shocked when she learned that my water had broken and I wasn’t already heading to the hospital.  She told me to call my Doctor’s office immediately.   When I called, they put my call through to Triage.  Triage told me to pack my bag and come on into the hospital.  I then had to inform Brandon that he wasn’t going anywhere, except with me to the hospital.

I then called Diana and told her what was happening.   She lovingly came and picked up Emery and Talmage whose bags were already packed and ready to go.  I told her that I wasn’t sure if they would even admit me without being in true labor.  She laughed and told me that I was going to have that baby!.

While driving to the hospital I called Melissa, who was planning on being in the delivery room with us, and then I called my Mom to give her the update.  Everyone was shocked at how calm I was.  We had to check in through the emergency room, which brought back a lot of bad memories from February, but I was in the hospital and was likely to have a baby, and that brought a lot of joy.  Eventually they processed our paperwork and they took me in a wheelchair up to the 3^rd floor to Labor and Delivery. Brandon and Makenna accompanied me of course.  They took me to Triage and filled out tons of paperwork.  They tested the fluid that I was leaking to make sure it was amniotic fluid.  It was!! The admitted me at around 7:00 at night and thus began the journey to having our 4^th child.

Once in the room, I was quickly hooked up to monitors for the baby’s heart rate, and to monitor my contractions.  All of the memories came flooding back from my other deliveries.  I however was not in any pain and this was new for me.  My contractions would come every 10 minutes or so, but I could breath through them okay, so I didn’t need any pain medication at that point. Our wonderful nurse Linda H introduced herself and remained with us all evening.  When Linda checked me, I was only dilated to a 3 which wasn’t anything different from my doctor appointment the day before when she stripped my membranes.  I still couldn’t believe that I was in a hospital bed 11 days before my due date.  It still didn’t feel real to me.  As the night wore on my contractions got stronger and stronger but by 10:30 at night I was still at a 3 at not progressing very much.  Makenna worked on homework, Brandon tried to sleep.  I played on my iPad for awhile and watched a little TV.  By 11:30 I was started on Pitocin took about an hour and a half to kick in and make my contractions stronger.  All the while, Brandon and Makenna lay next to me sleeping on a pull out bed.  I continued to endure the labor and breath through each contraction on my own.  It was surreal to be in such a quiet room and reflect on the amazing and sacred thing that was about to happen.  By 1:00 a.m. Melissa came to the hospital.  She worked on the lighting for her camera and began taking some preliminary pictures.    My contractions got stronger and stronger.  I was dilated to a 4 which wasn’t at all what I was hoping for.  I was hoping for a 6 or 7.  By 2:30 a.m. I asked for an epidural.  I was in pain, but it wasn’t anything I couldn’t stand.  But knowing that the anasthesiologist could take 30 minutes to get there, I decided  I’d got ahead and order one.  Little did I know that he’d walk through the room 30 seconds later.  Brandon and Melissa left the room , and cute Makenna stayed with me while I got numbed with the coolness of the epidural.  She was a champ and watched every single step of the procedure with awe and curiosity. 

As the nurse helped me to lay back down, a large gush of water exited from between my legs.  The next couple of contractions before the epidural took over, were really painful and I was all too excited when I felt myself go numb.  Then Makenna, Melissa and I made ourselves comfortable while we watched the movie Young Victoria.  Time seemed to go quickly then.  Around 4:15 a.m. I told Makenna to get off the bed because I felt I was going to throw up.  I did.  Mainly water, but it was all over the place.  The nurse came in and changed my clothes and bedding and then check me again.  I was at a 6!! I was elated.  I knew from past experience that I go from 6 to 10 in a matter of minutes.  The nurse took my soiled sheets out of the room and I immediately felt the need to push.  I told Makenna to push the nurses button and Linda quickly came back in.  I told her what I was feeling.  She check me again and I was indeed at a 10.  She hollered in the hallway for my doctor, and the two of them set up for delivery in about 2 minutes.   Then the pushing began.  I had never pushed before so this was something new for me.  Makenna held one knee and Brandon held the other. Melissa was up behind my head taking tasteful pictures of the whole event. Brandon had the video camera rolling.

I pushed about 5 times counting down from 10, and out popped a little head.  I looked down to see a head full of dark hair.  I looked at Makenna who was crying and seemed overwhelmed at what she was seeing.  One more push, and out came Camryn Belle.  She was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.  She had the sweetest little cry and was covered in white vernix.  The joy that overcame me was so full that my tears flowed freely and I was relieved that she had finally come into the world and that she came so safely.  Makenna cut the cord. Then I stroked and kissed this precious little miracle that had been place on my chest.  After 10 minutes or so, they took her and weighed her and cleaned her up.  She weighed 7lbs. 5 oz. and was 19 inches long.  When they brought her back over to me, she immediately started rooting around and within seconds latched right on and began eating.  What a relief that was to me, that 4 for 4 of my children have had no problems with nursing. What a blessing and a miracle.

For the next hour, Brandon and Makenna and I were holding, sharing, kissing, and drooling over this precious and gorgeous little Camryn as her new life on earth began.  It was the most blessed, and spiritual experience of my life.  Words cannot express the sheer joy that filled my heart.

Now here we are 3 weeks later.  I am so sleep deprived that I can hardly walk straight.  Family has come into town to meet her and be part of her blessing, and have since gone back home. Now just 3 days until Christmas, and our home is forever changed.  Though tired, I am still elated, and this has to be the most amazing blessed Christmas of my life.  Brandon gave her the most beautiful blessing filled with promises that if she is faithful, she will have many blessings fill her life.  He got choked up when he said, “Camryn, you were very much prayed for and long awaited for.” I lost it when he said that.  The years of waiting, praying, and trying to have a baby were finally over, and now here she was on her blessing day receiving a name and a blessing and beginning a beautiful new life.

I am so utterly grateful.  Grateful that all 4 of my children have come here safely. Grateful for the timing in which she came, despite my questioning it for so many years. And so grateful to a Heavenly Father who is mindful of me, who knows my wants and desires, and who answered me many years ago that I would have another child.  I knew it would happen, but only questioned when it would.  I am grateful for having to wait for her arrival.  She was well worth the wait.  I love my little Camryn Belle.